Julie Sanders

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Marriage Mondays: THIS is romantic!

Friendship· Marriage Encouragement· Relationships

It’s been almost 22 years since Jeff and I made our vows to each other in a small stone church full of family and friends.  Romance has changed through the years, and what speaks to our hearts has grown up and seasoned. Today at Chrysalis Cafe, people are sharing about the topic of romance in marriage. There will be talk of foot rubs, candlelight dinners, babysitters, quiet moments, and conversation.  And there should be. But this past Saturday, I was blessed with a sweet expression that spoke “romance” to me. 

Plans had been made for an overnight backpacking trip at the end of the spring break week, but a re-injured ankle put a stop to that. I committed to speak at a women’s tea, welcoming a new pastor’s wife to the sweet family of ladies at First Baptist Church of Friendsville. Becky had been part of our staff, so it made it extra sweet to go serve with them. They asked me to share about “Becoming a Godly Servant.”  Jeff and the kids had the morning together to go for a bike ride while I was gone to talk about being a servant.

That’s when it happened. Jo thought to snap a picture for me, to show me the romance happening in the kitchen, though I wasn’t even there. Jeff put up the chairs and scrubbed the kitchen floor for me. While Jacob was mowing and Jo was vacuuming, Jeff was on his hands and knees serving me. No candles, no music, no rubbing of feet, not even any “ME” present, but totally romantic. His act of serving spoke volumes of love to me. 

A servant has “this mind” that is “yours in Christ Jesus,” and “this mind” is one that “counts others more significant than yourselves” (Philippians 2:3-7). It’s the same attitude Jesus had that motivated Him to take on the form of a servant. It gets on the floor to clean, while the one it loves is gone. A servant has a change of thinking:

  • YOU instead of ME
  • US instead of I
  • HIS glory instead of MINE

God is glorified by the romantic action of serving one another. I think He’s glorified when Jeff rubs my feet, too, but that one’s a little harder to sell. 😉

  • How can I serve the one I love so I speak love to him?
  • How can you serve your loved one today?

Reader Interactions

Comments

  4. Connie McConnell Hopkins says

    Loved this post! It made me tear up to see him on his hands and knees. I think it's easy to get caught up in the world's idea of romance, usually self-serving and we forget the ultimate example of love-Christ Himself coming as a servant and sacrificing Himself for us! Thanks for making me get a warm and fuzzy this morning!
    Connie

  5. Jess says

    Awesome! I don't "test" very high for acts of service as far as love languages go…(I think my love language might be desserts) but I do think when my hubby does things around the house for me it speaks VOLUMES. I had the verse "Perfect love casts out fear" written on our chalkboard and he erased it this weekend and rewrote it to say, "Perfect love does the dishes" AND I totally took it as a romantic love note. 😉 

  6. Lo Supersunshine says

    Oh this was really sweet…what a wonderful family you have! Thanks for visiting my place and your kind words. 

  7. Tami Boesiger says

    "God is glorified by the romantic action of serving one another." Amen, sister. Point well taken.

  9. e-Mom says

    Wonderful. Love the candid snap!!!

    I would be totally blessed by that special act of love too…

    I enjoyed your post! Thanks for joining us for Marriage Monday today, Julie.
     
    Blessings, e-Mom @ Chrysalis ღ

  10. Julie Arduini says

    I remember being frustrated wishing there was more of a firework kind of romance going on after a few years and then realized when I have a computer issue, he drops everything to help me. He buys appliances and tells others he wants to do whatever it takes "to make my day easier." It was then I realized this guy is full of romance and I am blessed. Thank you for a great post.

  11. Julie_Sanders says

    I think it's completely romantic to have the dishes done. 😉 And I made sure to tell my servant-leader that help around the house is as much or more of a "turn on"  when my plate is full as flowers. 🙂  And I have to admit that I love cooking more when I know I don't have to do dishes!
    Julie Sanders http://www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com

  13. Julie_Sanders says

    Thanks so much Monica. It's funny that some times I respond to acts of service more than other times. I really love it that my husband knows me well enough to know when I am doing a bit of a balancing act or feeling loaded down, and so the best gift he could give me is some HELP! 🙂 He challenges me to be aware of when HE is weighed down and needs me to get on my "servant's gloves" and help him, too.
    Julie Sanders http://www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com

  18. Christine- Fruit in Season says

    Yes!  We need to be telling this to all of the young marrieds out there.  Wonderful post!

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