What does a roll of TP have in common with our marriages? Find out in today’s vlog where I ask, “How little is too little?”
If you don’t see the video in your viewer, click here: How much is too little for a strong marriage? on Vimeo.
A husband and a wife each have limited energy, time, attention, and affection to give. So many good things compete for our limited availability.
- Household chores
- helping with homework
- taking care of finances
- maintaining relationships
- work outside the home
- work in the home
- ministry
- hobbies
- kids
- serving at church
- social media
- exercising
There’s no end to the “good” options. Sometimes, we give so many bits and pieces of ourselves away to “good” things that we’re left with too little to give each other. Too little for a healthy, strong marriage relationship. We have to ask ourselves what “good” things can be left out or put back into their rightful place. We have to ask God to show us what is robbing our husband of what he may need: more of us. And not just quantity, but quality.
Are you longing for a strong marriage? Does your spouse need more of you? Would you pray this prayer with me today?
A prayer for a strong marriage
Dear God,
you know I’m busy with lots of good things & some not-so-good things, & you know it’s impacting my marriage. Would you give me a fresh look at how I’m spending my time and where I’m giving away and using up my energy, attention, and affection? Help me change so I’m not leaving too little behind for the one who should be first, after You. Help me be available to give myself for a strong marriage. Thank you for not being too busy for me.
I’ve been married 43 years to my husband. It wasn’t great at first – then it got better. There is never a time when too little is too little. When you are grasping at the thinnest filament to keep the fabric from fraying entirely – every wisp caught in the knot will help.
That’s a good way to look at it too, especially when a couple is struggling. I hope you hear my heart in this that when couples have pattern of leaving “too little” to meet each other’s needs, the quality of the relationship suffers. So many things compete for a couple’s availability to each other. When we settle for “leftovers,” it takes a toll. How wonderful that you’ve been married for son long and have seen the value of making each other a priority in each other’s lives.
I definitely read your intended meaning. We are so caught up in the good things that the good things spread us too thin. It’s the prioritization of prioritizations. I understand the competing influences of so many good things, they almost become bad things. There are many things I could say about the task of staying married. What I can say is that it’s worth it, if you stick it out.