There are some things about Heaven that bother me. Things I think I see in God’s word, but I’m not sure I like the answers. After all, the only reality I can relate to is “here” and “now,” so it’s impossible (it really is impossible) for me to relate to the glories of Heaven. For all of my big ideas, my thinking is quite small. It’s hard to grasp how I can be eternally content in Heaven, if some of what I love now isn’t there.
For starters, how could it be “Heaven” without my favorite coffee shop? I know it sounds silly, (and it is …) because I am still on earth, struggling to tear myself away from a mind full of earthly things, learning to turn more to heavenly things. We are hopelessly addicted to earthly things.
So how can it be “Heaven” without marriage?
Since we’re looking at Heaven this month and it’s also Marriage Monday, let’s chew on the question of whether there’ll be marriage in Heaven.
Marriage is earthly & makes us think earthly
While marriage is a joy, it brings greater relational concerns, the responsibility of children, the tasks of providing/helping, and the often challenging task of living peacefully as one. It’s not a piece of cake. Paul cautioned that, “those who marry will have worldly troubles.” (1 Corinthians 7:28)
Husbands and wives share burdens about things of this world, including the burden of pleasing each other. “But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, and his interests are divided. … But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband.” (from 1 Corinthians 7:33-34)
Marriage is passing away
This life and the way we live it is temporary. Paul mentions things like sadness, joy, possessions, and marriage as earthly “forms” or manners of living (schema) that were not meant to last for eternity. “For the present form of this world is passing away.” (1 Corinthians 7:31b)
I want to be married to Jeff Sanders for eternity! The question of whether or not eternity includes marriage in heaven isn’t an easy one. I think one of the reasons we wrestle with it is we don’t like the answer we get when we dig for truth. The question has always caused problems. Religious leaders even tried to raise the question with Jesus, just to entrap him, knowing it’s a bit of a “no-win” question. Instead, Jesus pointed out their ignorance … their addiction to earthly thinking.
“But Jesus answered them, ‘You are wrong, because you know neither the Scriptures nor the power of God. For in the resurrection they neither marry nor are given in marriage, but are like angels in heaven.'” (Matthew 22:29-30)
Finally … I’ll be angelic!
Angels don’t unite with each other and bear children, and in eternity, we won’t either. Our earthly manner of life means husbands need helpers and wives need provider/protectors, but we won’t have those needs in heaven. We’ll be perfect (finally!) people living in a perfect home.
Scripture gives evidence that glorified, heavenly people will be recognizable for who they are (like Jesus, Moses & Elijah were), so we can expect to know each other. But the forms (schema of 1 Cor. 7:31b) of the way we live now will have faded. Our new relationships will be more perfect than we can imagine.
- No nagging.
- No marriage counseling.
- No arguing.
- No bad breath.
- No financial stress.
- No sexual tension.
- No hurt feelings.
- No apologies.
- No selfishness.
- Perfect harmony.
Marriage in heaven?
I still want to be married to Jeff Sanders for eternity. These truths about Heaven are still hard for me to wrap my mind around. But God tells me Heaven has no sorrow or sadness or pain, so I trust Him that Jeff and I will both rejoice in the new “schema” of Heaven … for eternity.
What do you think about marriage in Heaven?
Read along tomorrow as we talk about the 3 heavens.
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Charlie says
I’ve had this conversation a lot recently. My current conclusion is that the only example of what eternity (a new heaven and a new earth) will be like, is the perfect earth before the fall. In that perfect earth, Adam and Eve were ‘married’ to one another and therefore I think there will be marriage in eternity but in perfect, originally intended relationship.
As you say, when the religious leaders spoke, they were trying to trap Jesus and although Jesus said there will be no *new* marriage, his response was, as you say, pointing out that we can’t get our heads around all that heaven is.
Pre-fall marriage is something I really want to look into as it should also be our example of how to live marriage now, even if we fail!
Julie Sanders says
That’s such a good point, Charlie. My husband and I discussed that this weekend, because marriage was not simply a response to the curse. The union of men and women was created pre-fall. Imagine how wonderful Adam and Eve’s union was before sin entered in! We can definitely look forward to perfect relationships for eternity. THAT’s something to be excited about!
Dori Cook says
I love this discussion, Julie.
What has me thinking about this further is that while the marriage of Adam and Eve was pre-fall, it wasn’t a “heavenly” union. It was very much an earthly union, between earthly beings and for very earthly reasons — Adam was lonely, Adam needed a helper, etc. Those reasons don’t exist in Heaven.
Great discussion!!
Julie Sanders says
So insightful, Dori. It’s hard to wrap my earthly mind around heavenly things. I’m pretty sure I don’t even have a “place” in my thinking now to conceive of what God has for us. I can’t even imagine not needing what I need now. You are so right about our needs not existing in heaven. I can’t wait to find out!