This year calls on dads to do their best in the worst times. As we approach Father’s Day, we have reason for fresh thanks. Every mom knows what trials invaded her first six months of this decade, but we do well to consider how much it helps to have a good dad in bad times. If we reflect on the difference they make, we appreciate them in different ways in what is a different year.
I shake my head at the rapid change that interrupted my own family’s well-laid plans this year. They didn’t include canceled commitments, frantic packing, or moving to what felt like a ghost-town. But we did. Then a grown child with his own interrupted plans scrambled to make a Plan B, drive cross-country, and move in to what I thought would be my new guest room. My unexpected events were easier than others in my social media feed. All of us have our own pandemic story with our own challenges.
Dads have a story to tell too. They doesn’t sound like a mom’s story. It’s theirs in their unique dad-style. It’s a story of doing their best to be father through the worst times.
Challenges
We know how COVID-19 and global unrest impact moms. What about dads? Many moved to work from home. Others lost jobs or faced demanding settings. Dads watched schools cancel and kids come home. Dads carried the weight of worry about family members’ health. Some wrestled with church decisions. All grappled with tough conversations and decisions.
Dads haven’t fathered like these before.
Opportunities
So many dads have stepped up in days that could’ve beaten them down. These times have proven to be an opportunity for fathers to rise to an uninvited occasion. Dads have:
- helped moms figure out stay at home orders with kids
- helped kids learn to face a new and unknown world
- helped relatives get what they need and feel safer
- helped churches figure out how to fellowship
- helped students from kinder to college plan to learn at home
- helped kids adjust expectations and celebrate in new ways
In many cases, dads led the way. In others, dads helped. After all, children need guidance of both parents (Proverbs 1:8), the reassurance of a strong, unified home. Where moms and dads work together, kids benefit from seeing teamwork.
COVID-19 made us want to control … something! When our young adult needed to move home to our new (and smaller) home , Jeff reassured me it wasn’t all up to me to figure out. When there needed to be conversations, Jeff’s role as “dad” freed me up in my role as “mom.” I prayed for wisdom to step back, giving him space and freedom to be the father with more encouragement, less analysis. Teamwork.
Victories
Some of the best victories for dads have emerged in these worst of times. “Required” in most cases to be more present, more dads have gotten more involved with family at home. Game playing, chicken coop building, TikTok making, and tea partying replaced activities that sometimes hijack dads. They exchanged fantasy leagues for family nights, working out alone for working in together. They volunteered to help in new ways and new places. Dads make lasting impacts with messages like, “God can do this” and “We can do this” and “You can do this.”
Impacts
One good thing in this bad time is the impact of good dads. God plans for dads to make a difference in families, in moms and kids and communities. The writer of Proverbs says, “When I was a son with my father, tender and precious to my mother, he taught me and said, ‘Your heart must hold on to my words. Keep my commands and live,’” (from Proverbs 4:1-4).
As dads face challenges in 2020 by following God’s priorities for loved ones, it’s good for dads, moms, children, and communities. The example of dads doing their best in the worst times gives kids a reference point for how a Heavenly Father works for their good.
Not all homes have a dad. 41% of kids lived in homes without a married mom and dad in 2015. A mom can seek out a godly dad or relative in her church or community to include kids in their ripples of influence. The church can say, “We can do this.”
Help for dads in the worst times
If you’re a married mom, how is the dad in your life doing with the challenges of 2020? Embracing the opportunities? Experiencing victories? Having an impact on you and on the next generation? No one else can pray with so much insight for the “man” in your family. As his teammate, you’re invested like no other.
Thanks to COVID-19 for giving us fresh thanks for the fathers in our lives. Let’s understand and uplift them as they do their best in the worst of times.
- What are you learning about the dads in your life?
- How have the challenges created opportunities for them?
- How have they risen up to meet needs kids (of any age) are feeling now?
- How could the dad in your life impact you and your children in this time?
- How can we encourage the dad in our life to make the most of this messy time?
More good things for the worst times
- Want to give “your dad” a meaningful Fathers Day gift that makes a difference? Check out this opportunity with Live Global to choose a gift to change a life. Choose a gift from the COVID-19 Compassion & Global Giving Guide. You’ll receive a beautiful card in the mail to share about your gift in your dad’s honor.
- Read about how to make decisions for what your COVID-19 story will be.
- Read about how to do good in these Coronavirus times.
