I have a problem with being present. I’m not the only one, because a search for #fullypresent on Instagram turns up about 10 thousand hits. Is it hard for you to be #fullypresent? I hear people talk about wanting to be fully present, even getting away or pushing away so they can experience it themselves or give it to others. It sounds like a lot of us have a problem being present.
For over a month, I’ve been planning to be here to talk about this topic, but I’ve been absent. While in other places, I thought and read and prayed about what it takes to be “fully present” in today’s world. I learned three secrets. And while you’re here, because you may not be here long, I want to entrust you with what the 3 secrets I found.
The 1st secret to being Fully Present: ABSENCE
First, being fully present in one place means being absent in others. I’ve haven’t been “here,” because I was in other places and with other people. Every day, every one of us decides how to use our limited time, energy, and resources. Small choices lead to absence in one place, presence in another. Answer the chime on our phone, advance to another episode, walk to another room for a conversation with someone somewhere else, stay late at work just because, scroll and scroll while ignoring our inner voice, or stay home when we said we would come. Absence happens when we give our attention somewhere else.
It’s a lie to believe I’m not able to be fully present when I need or want to be. I can be fully present, but not omnipresent (everywhere at once). Yes, that means I choose who I will let down. But to be “all here,” I have to decide/agree/choose to be absent in less important places. Where do I most need to be now?
The 2nd secret to being Fully Present: TRUST
Next, being fully present requires trust. I have to let go of all the thing and the people and the problems and the pleasure and the opportunities of “else.” Somewhere else. Someone else. Something else. I have to know all else is held by the God who is all knowing, all powerful, and in all places. Since He is always and everywhere fully present, I can let go. God can be trusted to hold all things. I can be fully present in one place and with one person, because He never will be. Unlimited in His presence and capacity, I can trust God with all I need to set aside.
I need to ponder that over again: I can be fully present in one place and with one person, because He never will be.
The 3rd secret to being Fully Present: LOSS
Last, to be totally mindful and engaged where I am and with the ones I’m with, I have to accept some losses to receive more gains. A constant stream of status updates, news updates, and device updates warns us that if we turn away, even momentarily, we’ll miss out. Not only will we be excluded from knowing something we could know, but our ignorance or absence may mean we’re left out. Cancelled.
If I’m going to get what I want most, I have to lose what I don’t really need. If I want depth of friendship, healthy family relationships, meaningful activities, and heartfelt communion with my Maker, those things need to trump lesser things. I won’t be included in many places at many moments, and that’s just realistic, healthy, and more than okay.
Is it hard for you to shut down the things to do, the things to know, the hordes of people, and the images of all the places? I can’t be the only one, because I see people using #allthethings an awful lot—over 350 thousand times on Instagram.
We need to be okay with losing our participation in what’s popular: changing my profile picture in the first hours of a worldwide event, knowing what everyone’s talking about, having something to say about what everyone’s talking about, or being someone everyone talks about. If I lose lesser things, I gain what I treasure most.
“Whoever finds their life will lose it, and whoever loses their life for my sake will find it.” (Matthew 10:39) – Jesus
It’s possible to be fully present—in one place at a time. So how will you be all there in the place and with the people who matter most? Choose to be absent, believe you can trust, and let go of the lie of inclusion.
That’s all. It was good to be present with you for now. I was here because you, my readers, are important. Until next time, let’s lose lesser things and go find our lives.
4 Questions to Ask to be More Fully Present
- How do I need to be fully present that I’m not?
- Where do I need to be absent more?
- What will happen if I trust God to hold things I let go?
- How could I gain if I lose less important things?
