She’s been married a short enough time to expect that anniversaries are always celebrated on “the day” and that you always have a chance to shower before a “date night.” The new-ish bride’s honesty was refreshing as she admitted to me what so many others have shared and what I’ve discovered myself: marriage is a LOT of work, maybe more work than we could’ve ever known before we took our vows.
Along the way of marriage, some stop working, some grit their teeth and tackle the challenges, others give up, and some bail out altogether. The sweetness of marriage is never realized without a lot of work.
In honor of Labor Day in my country, I want to remind myself (and let you listen in…)
- Ask my husband if I’m meeting his needs and how I could do better.
- Ask a trusted friend what our marriage “looks like” from the outside.
- Read a marriage book written from a biblical perspective.
- Attend a conference, workshop or class about growing a stronger marriage.
- Go away together overnight without your children.
- Pray for my husband and write down what I’m praying.
- Read what God says in the Bible about marriage, re-read, re-read, & memorize.
- Make your bedroom someplace special, instead of a storage room/family room/ironing room.
- Set aside money in your budget to invest in one “work on your marriage” idea.
- Carve out time for conversation with each other to listen and share without interruption.
- Are you surprised at how much work marriage takes?
- What are you doing to “labor” at having a marriage that’s better next year than today?
Maybe “Labor Day” is the perfect time to recommit to getting back to work on experiencing the sweet things of two becoming one.
rach says
a few very good reminders for me…thank you. and yes, marriage is a LOT of work. but such a picture of God, isn't it? Thanks for this post
Kellysuekelly.blogspot.com says
Ask someone what your marriage looks like from the outside? I feel like that's a scary question what if they say something disheartening?! I used to place so much value on how my marriage looked on the outside that I never bothered to work on it from the outside.
Thanks for these reminders and I had to laugh because my mon used to tell me marriage is a lot of work before I got married and I always rolled my eyes. Well- she was right. And I'm actually married to a very awesome man! So you'd think that'd make it easier!
Great post
Julie_Sanders says
We probably all rolled our yes pre-vows. 🙂 Okay … be careful who you ask. 🙂 I've appreciated some of the feedback from faithful friends who have given me insights and also encouragement when I needed them most. I've got an awesome man, too, and it's still work. It's that whole "being human" thing. 🙂 Blessings on your oneness!
Julie Sanders
http://www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com
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