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Julie Sanders

Julie Sanders

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  • EXPECTANT – a New Mom’s Devotional

September 5, 2011 ·

Marriage Mondays: 10 Ways to Work on Marriage

Marriage Encouragement· Relationships

She’s been married a short enough time to expect that anniversaries are always celebrated on “the day” and that you always have a chance to shower before a “date night.” The new-ish bride’s honesty was refreshing as she admitted to me what so many others have shared and what I’ve discovered myself:  marriage is a LOT of work, maybe more work than we could’ve ever known before we took our vows.

Along the way of marriage, some stop working, some grit their teeth and tackle the challenges, others give up, and some bail out altogether. The sweetness of marriage is never realized without a lot of work.

In honor of Labor Day in my country, I want to remind myself (and let you listen in…)

10 Ways to Work on My Marriage

  1. Ask my husband if I’m meeting his needs and how I could do better.
  2. Ask a trusted friend what our marriage “looks like” from the outside.
  3. Read a marriage book written from a biblical perspective.
  4. Attend a conference, workshop or class about growing a stronger marriage.
  5. Go away together overnight without your children.
  6. Pray for my husband and write down what I’m praying.
  7. Read what God says in the Bible about marriage, re-read, re-read, & memorize.
  8. Make your bedroom someplace special, instead of a storage room/family room/ironing room.
  9. Set aside money in your budget to invest in one “work on your marriage” idea.
  10. Carve out time for conversation with each other to listen and share without interruption. 

  • Are you surprised at how much work marriage takes? 
  • What are you doing to “labor” at having a marriage that’s better next year than today? 

Maybe “Labor Day” is the perfect time to recommit to getting back to work on experiencing the sweet things of two becoming one.


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Related

Previous Post: « Marriage Mondays: 10 Ways to Work on Marriage
Next Post: Combustible or Clinging? »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. rach says

    September 6, 2011 at 8:44 am

    a few very good reminders for me…thank you. and yes, marriage is a LOT of work. but such a picture of God, isn't it? Thanks for this post

  2. Kellysuekelly.blogspot.com says

    September 19, 2011 at 3:15 am

    Ask someone what your marriage looks like from the outside? I feel like that's a scary question what if they say something disheartening?! I used to place so much value on how my marriage looked on the outside that I never bothered to work on it from the outside.
    Thanks for these reminders and I had to laugh because my mon used to tell me marriage is a lot of work before I got married and I always rolled my eyes. Well- she was right. And I'm actually married to a very awesome man! So you'd think that'd make it easier!
    Great post

  3. Julie_Sanders says

    September 19, 2011 at 6:04 pm

    We probably all rolled our yes pre-vows. 🙂  Okay … be careful who you ask. 🙂 I've appreciated some of the feedback from faithful friends who have given me insights and also encouragement when I needed them most. I've got an awesome man, too, and it's still work. It's that whole "being human" thing. 🙂 Blessings on your oneness!
    Julie Sanders
    http://www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com

    ________________________________

September 5, 2011 ·

Marriage Mondays: 10 Ways to Work on Marriage

Marriage Encouragement· Relationships

She’s been married a short enough time to expect that anniversaries are always celebrated on “the day” and that you always have a chance to shower before a “date night.” The new-ish bride’s honesty was refreshing as she admitted to me what so many others have shared and what I’ve discovered myself:  marriage is a LOT of work, maybe more work than we could’ve ever known before we took our vows.

Along the way of marriage, some stop working, some grit their teeth and tackle the challenges, others give up, and some bail out altogether. The sweetness of marriage is never realized without a lot of work.

In honor of Labor Day in my country, I want to remind myself (and let you listen in…)

10 Ways to Work on My Marriage

  1. Ask my husband if I’m meeting his needs and how I could do better.
  2. Ask a trusted friend what our marriage “looks like” from the outside.
  3. Read a marriage book written from a biblical perspective.
  4. Attend a conference, workshop or class about growing a stronger marriage.
  5. Go away together overnight without your children.
  6. Pray for my husband and write down what I’m praying.
  7. Read what God says in the Bible about marriage, re-read, re-read, & memorize.
  8. Make your bedroom someplace special, instead of a storage room/family room/ironing room.
  9. Set aside money in your budget to invest in one “work on your marriage” idea.
  10. Carve out time for conversation with each other to listen and share without interruption. 

  • Are you surprised at how much work marriage takes? 
  • What are you doing to “labor” at having a marriage that’s better next year than today? 

Maybe “Labor Day” is the perfect time to recommit to getting back to work on experiencing the sweet things of two becoming one.


Share with a friend?

  • Click to share on X (Opens in new window) X
  • Click to share on Facebook (Opens in new window) Facebook
  • Click to share on Pinterest (Opens in new window) Pinterest
  • Click to email a link to a friend (Opens in new window) Email
  • More
  • Click to share on Tumblr (Opens in new window) Tumblr
  • Click to print (Opens in new window) Print

Related

Previous Post: « Can you relate to Ethan?
Next Post: Marriage Mondays: 10 Ways to Work on Marriage »

Reader Interactions

Comments

  1. rach says

    September 6, 2011 at 3:44 am

    a few very good reminders for me…thank you. and yes, marriage is a LOT of work. but such a picture of God, isn't it? Thanks for this post

  2. Kellysuekelly.blogspot.com says

    September 18, 2011 at 10:15 pm

    Ask someone what your marriage looks like from the outside? I feel like that's a scary question what if they say something disheartening?! I used to place so much value on how my marriage looked on the outside that I never bothered to work on it from the outside.
    Thanks for these reminders and I had to laugh because my mon used to tell me marriage is a lot of work before I got married and I always rolled my eyes. Well- she was right. And I'm actually married to a very awesome man! So you'd think that'd make it easier!
    Great post

  3. Julie_Sanders says

    September 19, 2011 at 1:04 pm

    We probably all rolled our yes pre-vows. 🙂  Okay … be careful who you ask. 🙂 I've appreciated some of the feedback from faithful friends who have given me insights and also encouragement when I needed them most. I've got an awesome man, too, and it's still work. It's that whole "being human" thing. 🙂 Blessings on your oneness!
    Julie Sanders
    http://www.comehaveapeace.blogspot.com

    ________________________________

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Thanks so much for stopping in. I'm glad you're here. I believe we're meant to know peace in our lives, so I write about how to find it in our relationships and how to share it with others. I like to keep things sourced in God's truth and useful for life. May your moments here leave you with a little more peace for your days.

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"Julie’s writings and teachings have been spiritual markers in my life. The deep knowledge of the Word she possesses, and they way in which she delivers it through her writing are deeply impactful. I would say that my favorite piece about Julie’s work is the way she speaks truth in love. She never waters down scripture to fit someone’s desires. And she does this with so much grace and compassion."

Susan - Homeschool Mom, Foster Mom & Business Consultant, Mt. Juliet, TN

Julie Sanders, Author and Speaker
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2019-09-08T18:00:00-04:00

Susan - Homeschool Mom, Foster Mom & Business Consultant, Mt. Juliet, TN

"Julie’s writings and teachings have been spiritual markers in my life. The deep knowledge of the Word she possesses, and they way in which she delivers it through her writing are deeply impactful. I would say that my favorite piece about Julie’s work is the way she speaks truth in love. She never waters down scripture to fit someone’s desires. And she does this with so much grace and compassion."
https://juliesanders.org/testimonials/susan/
"Through the years and seasons of life, Julie willingly follows God's open doors and trusts Him at times when some windows have closed. I have gratefully watched, learned and gathered courage for my own following. Whether speaking, writing, or just being present, Julie's grace, wit, interests and love draw others closer in to listen and follow her in step with His grace and mercy."

Carla - Volunteer Coordinator, Harvest Church, Oswego, Illinois

Julie Sanders, Author and Speaker
5
2019-09-08T18:04:20-04:00

Carla - Volunteer Coordinator, Harvest Church, Oswego, Illinois

"Through the years and seasons of life, Julie willingly follows God's open doors and trusts Him at times when some windows have closed. I have gratefully watched, learned and gathered courage for my own following. Whether speaking, writing, or just being present, Julie's grace, wit, interests and love draw others closer in to listen and follow her in step with His grace and mercy."
https://juliesanders.org/testimonials/carla/
"Julie Sanders is uniquely gifted to speak the never-changing truth of God into the ever-changing lives of women. With authenticity and the confidence that grows from a journey of finding God faithful in every season, Julie calls women to find peace and comfort in Him alone."

Kristi - Women's Ministry Director, The Chapel in North Canton, Canton, OH

Julie Sanders, Author and Speaker
5
2019-09-13T21:32:41-04:00

Kristi - Women's Ministry Director, The Chapel in North Canton, Canton, OH

"Julie Sanders is uniquely gifted to speak the never-changing truth of God into the ever-changing lives of women. With authenticity and the confidence that grows from a journey of finding God faithful in every season, Julie calls women to find peace and comfort in Him alone."
https://juliesanders.org/testimonials/9175/
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