Sickness gives married couples a chance to prove their love. I knew Jeff really loved me when I threw up all over his desk in college … and he cleaned it up. While my head was pounding with waves of virus, my heart was pounding with the realization that only real love stays and cares and serves when things get really ugly.

Has your marriage been visited by a virus this winter? Now?  How did you love each other through it?

I’m glad to say we haven’t faced a stomach bug so far this year, but we’re in week #4 of a respiratory virus that wants to stick around like a dryer sheet on a tube sock. In the middle of our weeks of woe, we’ve also hosted a global conference and a city-wide training day.  We’ve guarded our rest times, been satisfied doing the most important things, and given great thanks when the Lord sent a pot of chicken soup in the hands of a friend. More than once in the past weeks you could’ve caught me wandering the pharmacy aisles at the store, muttering, “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13).  And it was not the Dayquil talking!

To be sick together is to have a chance to love each other. Around our town in the past few weeks, I think a lot of families have had an opportunity to show their love. Every husband is different, and yours may have other “comfort foods” on his list than mine does, but these weeks have reminded me of some things that seem universal in caring for each other in times of sickness.

How to Love a Sick Man

1. Slow down so you’re available to take care of him.  You have to be there to care.
2. Observe his signals, so you understand how he feels.  Watch more, talk less.
3. Ask what you can do to care for him.  Be sincere and don’t make him feel foolish.
4. Do the important things, & let the unimportant things go. It’s not time to wash the curtains.
5. Speak his love language: movies? soup? comic books?  It’s good for kids to see that Dad’s #1.
6. Create a peaceful environment for him to rest. What says “peace” to your man?
7. Keep a list of heavy things that can wait.  It’s not time to talk about your taxes.
8. Carry the family load so he doesn’t have to. Help kids see how they can help.
9. Embrace the opportunity to be a servant. It’s a sacred, beautiful thing to serve your man.
10. Pray for him, asking the Lord to restore his health, strength, and energy. No one can pray for him like you can.

When sickness visits our homes, it is a chance to love each other. Of course we all pray that we won’t be sick together …  When mom and dad are both sick, it’s time to call in reinforcements! Serving each other in times of “sickness and in health” reinforces our love and commitment to each other.

And to show my love for my man today …. I’m making a call to the dr. 😉